Sunday Is Not Funday.

You would of thought my first Sunday would involve waking up late, making delicious brunch, watering the flowers (even if I had flowers odds are I would forget to water them), feeding the birds (toppins a bag- name that movie. Oh, also I am petrified of birds so this wouldn't happen either), baking a pie (which I would burn) you know just a lazy 1950's housewife like Sunday doing eco friendly activities I always do. Ha.

Yup, this is exactly the type of Sunday I was looking forward to.  Rocking that apron and all. 

Well not my first Sunday. My first Sunday as I mentioned in my last post involved getting a new Teudat Zehut, a new Rav Kav and learning a lot about my new surroundings. All I gotta say is when times get tough I listen to Frank Sinatra... New York, New York.

Yes, yes, I do miss this. Hence it's my Whatsapp background.  (photo credits- yours truly) 

I sent my friend these little shortie moments from that fateful day. Now they are public. I will be signing autographs tomorrow.

* You know when there is a long line, so there is that ticket machine thing with the numbers and you just wait for your number to be called? So in any other country that system works like a charm. Then you get to Israel. The first person in the line was number 34. The number on the screen was number 2. The people behind the counter started yelling at all of us that we don't come running the second our number is on the screen. I just wanted to yell back, " sweetie, it's because you don't count 2, 34, 35 etc." We had to wait and wait because according to them "someone must have those numbers."/ Of course someone has them, how can I be so silly... of course someone took number 1-34 and ran off with them. Wow Rav Kav workers really are always right.

Anyhoo, the scene was getting pretty feisty but I pulled the "ummm ani m'America, lo yodaat ummm klum" card a few times because I just couldn't be bothered playing lawyer for these people today. So, I was number 44 and finally, my silent prayers were answered and 42 was on the screen. Two numbers away from getting on with my life!! The women next to me stares me up and down, most likely to see if I will take her up on the dare she is about to tell me. She tells me she is number 43. I was thinking "great, you want a medal or a monument for that. Why do I care?" Then a minute later she whispers to me that she spoke to a lot of people and she knows that there is no 42. She told me to crumple up my ticket and hand it to her so no one sees and act like I am number 42 so she can be next. It was probably the most Mosad-esque moment I have ever had in my life. I gave her my ticket and ran behind the counter to get my Rav Kav before anyone saw. I just felt her beaming at me. What a great little future Mosad agent she made out of me.

And believe me that was by far the most scandalous thing I have ever done in my life.

* When I was in Misrad Ha'Pnim waiting on line to fill out the form for my new TZ, this was the conversation happening right in front of me.

Aussie woman: "I Have a working visa that expires September 1 and I want to extend the visa until Decemeber."
Woman behind the desk: " Ok well I can give you an appointment to come in in October to extend it."
Aussie woman (why she still wanted to stay after hearing the ridiculous response to her question is beyond me): " but my visa will be expired by October. I may get deported"
Psycho behind the desk: " You won't get deported. There is no other time for an appointment. Come back in October. Bye."

Well I'm sure this Aussie was shipped back to the outback September 2.